since moving home most people ask if i am working or going to school... and when i say no (usually to strangers...) i get a funny or dirty look of why not... and you can see the wheels spinning with questions... i am sure they want to know where i get money to live on from and if their tax dollars are paying me... well in a way they are but not for the reasons they are probably thinking.
i have found out that there are some people jealous of me getting to live the way i do.. well if i could i would let them know i would give it all up to have kyle back and live in a card board box under a highway some where!!! i know i choose to marry him while he was in the army but you never stop to think of the "what ifs" when your in love.
life has thrown me a lot of curve balls and the best i can do is swing and hope to hit it over the fence(cheesy i know). some people may not like the way i live my life or the decisions i make, well, all i can say is sorry. its my life and these are my kids. we are happy, healthy and safe. thats what matters most in life!
things up coming.... these are the scary unknowns. what to do next? thats what i am working on now... after many failed attempts at lasting relationships, finding someone that makes me and my kids happy has been pushed even farther down the list. when the right person comes along i hope i am ready to trust again. too many lies and broken promises in the past. too many that want me to "take care of them" with my finances or just need a baby sitter.
damn it i made a promise when i started this blog it would be upbeat.. oh well i guess one pissy one can slide lol
xoxo
me
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